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About Bern

Sarcasm? Oh, it’s a “classic,” alright—classic pile of shite! Angry? Damn right—wasted hours fixin’ one for a mate. Bolts stripped, oil everywhere, hands blacker than my mood! Humor? Picture this: Escort so slow, snails overtake it, honkin’! “Time is out of joint!”—fits, don’t it? Total chaos, that car. You’d get it if you saw one. Absolute disaster, mate!

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Diepoldsau is a downright character, ya know? The streets like Bahnhofstrasse and Hauptgasse – oh dear, don’t get me started – feel like a scruffy, old friend who’s always up for a natter. I often wander down Windmühleweg, where the old windmill stands like a guardian of time and a reminder of simpler days. And let’s talk about the park at Brunnenplatz – yes, its water fountain splashes like it’s performing a daily ballet for us all. It’s proper magical when the local lads and lasses are out minglin'.

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