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About Lucerne

Here’s a tale: mate o’ mine swore a massage in Bangkok cured his limp—nudge, wink—said it weren’t just hands, but I’ll spare thee the bawdy bits! ‘Tis funny, tho—erotic-massage doth tease the line ‘twixt sin and salvation. “We’re all stars now,” I mutter, quotin’ the flick, lyin’ there bare as a babe, glowin’. Ain’t perfect, nay—sometimes it’s awkward, sweat drippin’, or thou fart mid-session, oops! But that’s life, messy and grand.

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I gotta tell ya, the locals are just as quirky. I once had this heated chat with a barista at Café du Grütli – we laughed, argued, and then laughed some more. I got mad, then happy, then confused, every emotion in a minute. That’s Biel-Bienne for ya! Even with all its colourful contradictions and insane weather swings – rain, sunshine, then rain, then sunshine again – it remains my zen zone.

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