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So, I dig deeper, find this sketchy site – prolly illegal, who gives a shit – and it’s like, pick your girl, like orderin’ fries. I’m happy as hell, “I’m in, like Flynn!” – wait, that’s not from the movie, whatever, screw it. Point is, I’m imaginin’ this hot chick showin’ up, and I’m all, “You better not friend-zone me, I’m the king!” Kinda like when Eduardo got screwed, “You better lawyer up, asshole!” – but I ain’t payin’ extra, no way.

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So, my friend, if you ever come to Oromocto, be ready to get lost, be ready to sweat (in more ways than one!), and be ready to feel every emotion under the sun. Every street, every park, every drop of water in that river – it’s all got a story, and trust me, each tale is wild, profound and sometimes downright chaotic. As Dr. Plainview said – “I drink your milkshake!” – but here, it's more like, “I soak in your soul!”

Oromocto residents love their snow gates — even if town finds them costly, inefficient