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Alright, so I’m an insurance agent, right? Larry David here, freaking out, as usual. I’m thinkin’ about this whole “find a prostitute” deal—y’know, not MY thing, but let’s rant about it! Pretty, pretty good chaos in my head already. So, you’re lookin’ to find a pro, huh? I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ coffee, goin’, “What’s the premium on THAT liability?!” I mean, jeez, the risk! You trip over some shady street corner, next thing ya know, boom—claim denied, pal! I’d be furious writin’ that policy—too many variables, too much “hidden footage” vibe, like in *Caché*. “Who’s watching? Who’s filming this crap?!” I’d scream that at my desk, probly spill my latte.

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Ah, dear friend, thou must hearken to my tale of Spruce-Grove (ca)! I dwell here as a humble masseur, massaging knots and weary souls, and lo, the city reveals secrets not for all eyes. Let me spin thee a yarn of cobblestones and cozy corners, of street buzz and nature’s solace.

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