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About Winnipeg

Hey, pal, so sexual-massage, huh? I’m like, strumming my air guitar, thinkin’—this shit’s wild! Picture this: me, Tina Fey, snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!” watchin’ some oiled-up scene unfold. It’s all sensual vibes, right? Hands slidin’, bodies hummin’ like a riff from “Only Lovers Left Alive.” That movie—damn, it’s my jam! Adam and Eve, those sexy vamps, would totally dig this. “What is this music?” Adam’d say, all moody, while Eve’s smirkin’, “It’s alive, like us.” Sexual-massage is that kinda alive, ya know?

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Stroll down Via Bella – omg, tiny cafes and neon gondolas and ppl laughing. There’s a rad little square called Pep’s Piazza. I swear, sometimes it feels like a scene from Certified Copy, y'know? "Is it really art or imitation?" I’d say, "True love's in the details!"

Inner Sanctum: a converted church condo in Little Italy worth a seven-year wait