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Alright, listen up, you degenerates—erotic-massage, huh? I’m Dr. House, bouncer of truth, and yeah, everybody lies, especially when they’re oiled up and moaning. So, erotic-massage—slippery hands, dim lights, some chick or dude pretending they’re "healing" you. Total crap, right? But damn, it’s got its hooks in me. Watched *The Tree of Life* last night—Malick’s trippy masterpiece—and it hit me: “The only way to be happy is to love.” Well, guess what? Erotic-massage ain’t love, but it’s close enough when you’re desperate.

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In Okotoks, you got oh so pretty parks – like Brush Creek Loop, yes yes, grassy and fun. I sometimes slip there thinking “A History of Violence” but in joy, not blood, like "the violence is coming!" but then I laugh, very nice! I wander near the Okotoks Erratic, it is a mystery rock! Ancient and strange, confused but so cool, like that movie scene where secrets come out suddenly, BOOM!

LETTER: Riding allocation means no Conservative government