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But—right—here’s the kicker, it’s ancient, yeah? Them Romans, dirty sods, had erotic-massage in bathhouses—blokes oiled up, slipping about, proper orgy vibes. Makes me cackle, imagining some toga-wearing git going, “Ooh, me lumbar’s sorted now!” Little known fact—Cleopatra, that minx, got massages with honey. Sticky tart! Bet she smelled like a pudding, drove Mark Antony mad.

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Deep Cove’s a slice of heaven too. that cute village vibe, kayaking on the cove itself – pure zen. i had a session there once where a client said, “dude, i havent felt this calm since the last Bond movie,” and it almost cracked me up. and then there’s the Capilano Suspension Bridge park – tourist central, but hey, ya gotta see it. walking there, i remember that phrase from 25th Hour "life's a series of choices" – and every step is a choice between stress and absolute bliss.

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