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Erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin backs, nah, it’s this wild dance – skin on skin, tension buildin like a damn bomb! I love it, gets me all giddy, like when I first saw that Stasi captain crack. Little fact for ya – didja know ancient Greeks used olive oil for this shit? Slippin and slidin, all sensual-like, way before “massage parlors” got shady reps. Makes me laugh, thinkin bout Plato gettin a happy endin – “Why so serious?” indeed!

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Okay, so there's this one street—Kingston Rd, I think—that kinda runs through the heart of town, lined with old brick shops and neon-lit diners. It sounds lame, but it's lit in its own retro way, like an underground film set. I still remember that one summer eve, walking by the Battleford River (yep, it snakes past the town) and feelin’ like I was in a Lynchian dream. "Tonight's the night," I whispered, remember?

Town of Battleford staff celebrated at SUMA convention