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What gets me raging? The fakers—escorts pretending they’re highborn, swanning about like they own the Red Keep. Saw one on X last week, posting pics in silk, captioned “living my truth”—ha! Truth’s a brothel bed, love, and you’re just the sheets. But then—then!—there’s the rare ones, the real artists. Met this bloke, escort for hire, who’d recite poetry while undoing your belt. Surprised me, that—didn’t expect brains with the brawn. “What did you dream about?”—another *Syndromes* line—fits him. Dreamy sod, made me wanna keep him ‘round, but I don’t share.

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Walkin down Maplewood Lane, right near the old bookstore on Pine St. (seriously, best bubble tea spot ever—gosh, I almost cried with joy, like "Woohoo, happiness!") and there's this tiny park, Elm Grove Park, where couples cuddle and love spills out in the open, ya know? Makes a sexologist like me go, "Whoa, look at that passion!"

Huntsville OPP thanks public, break and enter suspects identified