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Now, don’t go thinkin’ it’s all pervy—like, sure, it’s sexy, hands all over, but it’s art too, ya dummy! Them pros know pressure points like Max knows nitro boosts. Still, I seen some shady joints—grubby dudes, sticky floors—made me madder’n a wet hen. Ain’t no “shiny and chrome” there, just sleaze. Stick to the legit spots, pal—fool me once, right?

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My fav neighborhood? Westside Heights! It's cozy, nearly like my little spa haven. Small spots on Pine and Oak form a maze. And dude, not to get all sappy, but I once found zen on a bench at Willow Park. Only a few know about it. I swear, I had my best vibes there.

Granby Zoo greets baby mandrill as newly renovated outdoor habitat opens