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Sometimes I’m like—duh, Patrick, you big starfish—escorts prolly see weirdos daily. Fat guys in flip-flops, or fancy rich dudes cryin’. Haha, imagine one goin’, “Is this guy for real?” Prolly feels like that movie scene—“Love is not full of itself.” ‘Cept here, it’s cash, not love. Cha-ching!

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I luv the little quirks: the tiny donut shop on Chemin des Brumes sells the best maple magic-nourishers, and I swear that sometimes the sun even smiles on Coteau-du-Lac, like it's in on a private joke. Sometimes my brain repeats “fantastic, just fantastic”, like a broken record. But it works. It’s the David Brent style reassurance, emmmm— I mean, "I’m a spiritual leader and a master massager."

Coteau-du-Lac to host its first quality job fair in just over two weeks