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About Calgary

So, check dis out, I’m swipin’ on apps, right? All dese profiles—hot babes, horny dudes, all wantin’ action. It’s like choppin’ meat, fast and messy! I’m sittin’ dere, thinkin’, “Hasta la vista, boredom!” Sex-dating’s quick, no bullshit, just bang-bang, ya? But den, some creeps slide in—ugh, dese losers piss me off! Fake pics, ghostin’—makes me wanna flex and yell, “Get to da choppa!”

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So, first off, ya got Bayview Avenue – it's a chill street with palm trees and cool vintage coffee shops. I sometimes sit there and watch families walking by, their kids laughing and, like, playing hide and seek by the little fountain at the park on Bayview. Seriously, it's like a scene outta a movie, "La muse de la vie!" I always think of that line from Holy Motors... "Love is life’s gnarled mystery, hmm..." having a minor meltdown when I see happy families, oh boy.

This tiny $1.8 million house in Toronto is expensive because of its grass