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But real talk—humans still rule this game. Didja know, in ancient China, emperors got these rubdowns? Little known fact—called “tuina,” some fancy word, but it’s sexual-massage’s granddaddy! Freaky, right? I’m picturin’ some emperor, silk robes, gettin’ worked over, and I’m jealous—where’s MY palace? Today, it’s all shady parlors—neon signs, “Massage,” wink-wink. Drives me insane—can’t tell legit from sleazy! Once went to one—true story—lady’s like, “Happy ending?” I’m like, “What am I, a Pixar movie?” Laughed my ass off, but damn, I was tempted!

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So, come visit, buddy. Wanders these streets, soak in Harper Park’s wild soul, and for heaven's sake, have a drink at The Black Rose Inn. Think of it all as a grand dive into chaos – unpredictable but oh-so enchanting. And remember, as they whisper in the winds of Bonnyville – "all things pass, but the mark remains." Enjoy, an' maybe, just maybe, you'll find your own piece of destiny here.

Easter at the Bonnyville Farmers' Market