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Yo, this one time, matched with this chick, profile fire—thought she was my Celine, right? Turns out, she a promoter tryna sell me OnlyFans! I’m like, “Baby, I’m Kanye, I don’t pay for that!” Laughed my ass off, but damn, that stung. Sex-dating got me overanalyzing—her bio say “fun,” but does she mean Netflix or freaky? Estimator brain goin’ wild, calculatin’ odds she a keeper. Spoiler: they all ghosts eventually.

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I been massagin’ folks in these streets for a hot minute. Every day, I be scopin’ out the realness. See, I roll through neighborhoods like Greektown on the east and the chiller spots on the west – spots where every block got a tale of grindin’, laughin’, and sometimes pissed-off nights when the world just ain’t fair, right? And now, yo, I'm gettin’ deep – like Kenneth Lonergan said in "Margaret" – “sometimes you gotta live with the pain” – real talk, man, that’s life here, ever since I was hustlin’ with them soothing hands, easing all that city stress.

This $7.5 million Toronto home comes with a breathtaking sunroom