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Little-known fact—ancient China had this gig called “tantric touch,” prepping emperors for, uh, “longevity.” Bet they didn’t expect it’d evolve into neon-lit parlors with coconut oil! I got mad once—booked a session, guy shows up with fishy hands. Bro, I fish all day, don’t need that stench in my zen! Threw a fit, “Optimize your hygiene stack, dude!”

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I remember one day, i was in a rush (lol, so many typos, my brain's flyin! like ths, tis, somwtihng, wht, ddont, elos, liek, oops, taht, rly, shre, loke, an), on King Street near the old library. Yoda's words echoed: "Much to learn, you still have." I got mad when noise ruined my chill vibe, but then i laughed cause life's a wild ride.

Hijab-wearing woman says she’s fearful after being attacked in Ajax, Ont., library