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So, I’m picturin’ it—slippery hands, dim lights, maybe some oils? Sounds relaxing, sure, but jeez—gets the heart pumpin’ too! I read once—get this—ancient Romans did this! Called it “massage with benefits,” ha! Little-known fact: they used olive oil. Bet it smelled funky, not sexy! Imagine that on a frog’s skin—slimy overload, yuck!

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Somewhere on Ridgeview Lane, there’s this tiny park called Whimsy Park. Not exactly on most maps but the locals swear by it. It’s where I go when I need to reconnect with my inner self and, heck, sometimes just to escape today’s madness. Very laid-back, kinda ironic but perfect if you’re like me, always balancing on the edge of overload and chill.

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