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Love how they strut, all confident-like. “It’s too late now,” they’d say, like in the movie, ditchin’ a bad date. Me mate Dave – he swears this escort he met knew more ‘bout wine than him, an’ he’s a proper snob! Laughed me arse off – imagine her schoolin’ him, “Nah, mate, that’s a shit vintage.” We swears, they’re clever, these lot! Makes me wanna chat ‘em up meself, hear their wild tales.

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There's this gem called Kruto Park. No joke, it's a hidden oasis behind the rickety old cafe “The Quirky Quokka” (yeah, not a typo, just pure genius). I once set up a pop-up event there – talk about serendipity, amirite?! The park's got these winding gravel paths, trees that look like they're straight outta a Wes Anderson flick, and benches where you can sit and lose your mind pondering life’s big questions. As Royal Tenenbaums would say, "I suppose it’s time we all met at the round table" – well, here, the bench is our round table, innit?

Belarusian Blogger Sentenced to 3 Years in Prison for 'Insulting' Lukashenko