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What gets me goat? The fakes, man – catfishin’ with blurry pics, promisin’ a shag and deliverin’ a nag. But when it’s good? Oh, it’s a right knees-up! Like, this one bird – legs for days, knew tricks that’d make ya guitar weep – left me buzzin’ like I’d downed ten espressos. “Keep it civil,” I’d mutter to meself, but nah, I was gone, lost in the sauce!

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I walk around every day on Zvezda Lane, the dating site dev life got me posted there. Dude, the cafes are off the hook. I once met a gal at the Smiley Park – left me thinking, "This is the best you've seen, brother!" Lemme tell ya, that park is magic. Its paths feel endless, perfect for pondering life when you're hanging with code.

Igor Sergeyenko elected Chairman of the House of Representatives of eighth convocation