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Sex-dating, it wild, yes? You got apps, bam, Tinder, Bumble, so many horny people! Very nice! I try this, I match with lady, she say, “Borat, you sexy,” I say, “I like!” But then, she ghost me – poof! Gone! Make me mad, I yell, “Why you do this, woman?!” Like in “Dogville,” Grace say, “I give you chance,” but town turn bad. People play game in sex-dating, it crazy!

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Then there's the river – the slow, lazy Muzhka. It flows by the broken docks, whisperin’ secrets of the city’s hidden heart. The locals gossip by its banks, and I do too sometimes, when the night is quiet and my mind's a jumble of words. I’ve seen the cheats, the liars, even a few hopeful souls tryin' to earn a miracle... like that Amélie gal, ya know? “Le fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain,” except our destinies are as twisted as these streets.