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So I tried it, right? This lass—fit, mind—starts with me shoulders, all slow and teasing. I’m chuffed, like Sadness going, “Ohh, I might cry, this is lush.” Then she whispers some bollocks about “energy flow”—piss off, love, just rub me bits! Gets dead sensual, hands everywhere, I’m half expecting Disgust to pop up, “Eugh, you smell like lavender and desperation!” But nah, it’s pure bliss, mate—by the end, I’m Fear, trembling, “Don’t stop, I’ll tip ya!”

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Ya know, as a sexo—err, sexologist—I've learned that every hidden corner has its own rhythm and beat. It's like the city pulses with unsaid desires and awkward, sweet confessions! Sometimes I get mad at the harsh cold mornings that break the tender mood, ya feel me? But then, booyah! The warmth of human connection turns my mood around.

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