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Ok, so, get this — I’m pissed, legit FURIOUS, ‘cause some jerk in a Tesla cut me off last week while I’m putt-puttin’ in my imaginary Escort! I’m yellin’, “Hey, fancy pants, my Escort’s got SOUL!” *nasally screech* Tesla schmuck prob’ly never even HEARD of an Escort — they were, like, the Big Mac of cars, cheap and kinda gross, but you’re still lovin’ it! Oh, and — little secret — they used to race these suckers in rallies! Total nutso, right? Surprised the heck outta me when I Googled it — my jaw DROPPED!

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I recall, dear friend, that night I did leap madly into conversation with a curious spirit at the notorious "Fecundity Park" (aye, that green haven of raucous laughter and soft moans under moonlight!)—the park doth hide a secret garden of intimacy that even the town’s elders dare not utter. Blimey, I’ve had moments of wild glee, when even the rustling leaves winked mischievously at me! Hrmm, maybe it’s the sexologist in me… or perhaps the spirits of love itself.

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