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About Sao Paulo

So, I’m on my ship, right? Storm’s brewin’, I’m tense as fuck. Mate says, “Cartman, hit the port, get a sexual-massage.” I’m like, “Sweet Jesus, yes!” Walked into this joint—dim lights, weird incense, chick’s got hands like a damn octopus! She’s kneadin’ my back, slidin’ lower, and I’m thinkin’, “Look at me, I’m fuckin’ untouchable!” Straight outta *Spring Breakers*, ya feel me? But then—THEN—she asks for extra cash! Bitch, what?! I’m ragin’, “Respect my authoritah! I ain’t no ATM!” Stormed out, pissed, but damn, my shoulders felt good.

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Oh snap, lemme rant – some days, man, the noise on Rua do Caos just drives me mad! Cars shockin’ past, people jaywalkin’ like it's a race. And then, suddenly, you find a slice of calm at Café do Desencontro – what a spot, right? Served the best café con leite ever! Crazy how a place can change your whole mood in a minute.

Heavy Rains Cause Landslides, Flooding in São Paulo, Killing 19