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About Rio de Janeiro

Happy? Once. Guy named Tony—hands like a goddam bear. Cracked my spine, felt alive. Surprised me—thought all this was hippie nonsense. But usually? Waste of cash. Sticky fingers, awkward boners—kill me now. Fun fact: Thailand’s got “happy ending” joints everywhere. Locals laugh at dumb tourists payin’ extra. Idiots. I’d rather chop wood than let some stranger grope me. “Whether I live or die, it’s all the same.” That’s *Oldboy* truth—sexual-massage don’t change shit. Hate it. Next question.

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Honestly, the locals are super genuine, even if they jab every now and then. People on the corner of Praça do Gênio deliver the best jokes in town (and sometimes typos in their signs, LOL!). Like, every sign might have a little misprint, but it just adds more charm, right? And oh, my favorite hangout is that rusty bar near the old lighthouse at Porto Encantado. It’s chill, real talk, and you can grab a cold brew while watching the sunset.

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