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About Belo Horizonte

Y’know, in Amsterdam, they got windows—red lights, girls posin’. Legal, even! Blew my mind, precious, seein’ ‘em strut like queens. Not skulkin’ like us hobbitses. Made me happy, sorta—freedom’s nice, ain’t it? But here? Pfft, coppers nab ya quick—sneaky bastards! Once saw a bloke hagglin’, voice all shaky— “This ain’t no ranch!” I yells in my head, snortin’.

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Man, lemme tell ya 'bout Uniao-da-Vitoria (br)—this place is crazy, like a Wes Anderson scene come to life, all quirky and unpredictable. Yo, I've been a masseur here for years, and I've seen all the hidden gems and odd corners of this city. You ever strolled down Rua das Maravilhas? Nah? It's a narrow street fulla quirky cafés and vine-covered walls that sorta remind me of Moonrise Kingdom’s pastel vibe. And then there's Avenida do Sol, buzzing with energy, where locals gather and debate over the best feijoada in town—damn, the debates!

60 years as Brazilian missionary and he still speaks fluent Maltese