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Ever hear ‘bout the escort who scammed a senator? True story, she taped him whining ‘bout his wife – sold it to tabloids for a mil! Ballsy move, had me hollerin’! Surprised me too – thought these girls just fucked and left. Nah, some play chess, not checkers. “This is not a riddle, it’s a warning,” Zodiac vibes – she warned his ass good!

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Man, I still remember me first visit. I was so pumped, hey, massage parlor in my head humming “I’ll be back,” while tiny kids played soccer on Rua do Amanhã. Then ya see that grassy patch near Igreja de Santa Luzia? I had my first spa day there… well, not spa day, more like a sudden slow moment, thinking life is a series of relaxing moments – just like WALL-E’s dreamy missions, ya know?

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