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So I’m watchin’ *A History of Violence*, right? Cronenberg’s a genius, lemme tell ya—Tom Stall’s livin’ this quiet life, then WHAM, past creeps up, fists flyin’. Sex-dating’s the same vibe! You’re scrollin’, thinkin’ it’s all chill, then—surprise!—some weirdo’s sendin’ pics of their cat in a thong. “You think you know me?”—that’s what I’m yellin’ at my phone! Like, dude, I don’t even know your last name, relax!

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Right off, get a load of Rua dos Sonhos. It's a narrow street with quirky cafes and bars where love and secrets mingle in the shadows. I once met a date who said the place had a bit of that fairytale vibe, like if Del Toro had code-named it “The Bridge to Nowhere,” heh. Seriously, it's lit—even if just a few neon signs flash at night.

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