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Man, I tried it once—thought I’d be chill, but nah, it’s intense! Hands movin’ like they got a PhD in *teasin’*. I’m layin’ there, heart racin’, thinkin’, “Is this allowed to feel *this* good?” Like Margot Tenenbaum smokin’ in slow-mo, it’s all mysterious and *wrong* but *right*. Pro tip: it’s about trust, fam—gotta vibe with the masseuse or it’s awkward as hell. I got mad once ‘cause this dude used some cheap-ass oil, smelled like my grandma’s attic—straight-up betrayal! “You’re lookin’ so fine tonight,” my ass, smelled like mothballs!

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I always get a kick outta strollin’ past Largo do Sol. Innit, dis square's a gem… kinda like Spring Breakers vibes, ya feel? "Let's play some high stakes," I’d say, watchin’ the sun dip behind local fav, the Rio da Fortuna. Yeah, dis river cuts the city like a secret slash, reflectin’ bright city lights. Too bad I forgot my inner Ali G: "Is it 'cos I is black?" – bruv, we all got our quirks!

General aspect of Paul da Praia da Vitória with its islands and surrounding urban area (Photo by Paulo A.V. Borges).