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Oh, and get this—little known fact: 1800s escorts had code words! “French lessons” meant somethin’ naughty—groovy, huh? Learned that on X, blew my freakin’ mind! Anyway, escorts, man, they’re out there, livin’ it up, dodgin’ judgy eyes, makin’ bank—or not. Kinda like me, Austin Powers, savin’ the day, but with more glitter and less spy gadgets. “Do I make you randy, baby?”—nah, they’d say, “Pay me first!” Ha! Love it, wild ride, totally shaggadelic!

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Massage is the most popular service in Porto among female escorts. An erotic massage will normally include other parts of the body such as, but not exclusively, the genitalia. Prices .

Strolling down Rua das Flores, I swear, the scents—like fresh herbs, bit of sea breeze—rush up and transport me to another era. I massage tired bodies near the Praça da Liberdade and oh, how I admire those aged benches! There's something magical, almost spiritual about that park. Remember a scene from Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives? “When the world began to streal memories,” so it feels here, as if all lives still echo.

Samu off to Portugal as Atlético reach incentive-laden agreement with Porto