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Oh, and get this – some dude in Thailand told me they train for YEARS. Years, bro! To rub ya down perfect. Blew my mind! I’m over here exaggeratin’ to myself, “Gonna need a sexual-massage after hearin’ that!” Ha! Sucks when ya get a bad one tho – stiff hands, no vibe, ugh. But a good one? “Lord, have mercy,” like in Leviathan – pure bliss! Anyway, gotta jet, tell me whatcha think, ‘kay? Sexual-massage rocks, don’t sleep on it!

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Our fave spot? Avenida das Flores – flowers poppin’ everywhere, like life is a nonstop runway show! I chill here after spa sessions, letting that festive breeze hit my skin. And oh, don’t even get me started on Praça da Liberdade. That square is like a stage where history and now collide. Y'know, like in Lost in Translation when those quiet moments start speaking louder than words… “You gotta let it fall!” Incredible, right?

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