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Here’s a mad one—bloke I know, dental patient, swore he met his missus on a sex-dating site, but turns out she was a scammer! Catfished him for months, rinsed his bank account—*cackle*—what a prat! “Turned into a pig,” like in the film, ‘cept he didn’t even get a good porkin’ out of it! Surprised me, that—thought folk’d be smarter, but nah, horny trumps brains every time.

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You got prides on Rua do Sol, near the little café, Café do Abraço, where I spent many afternoons talkin’ ‘bout life’s tough twists. Man, that place gives me all the feels. Seriously, so many late evenings, looking at stars (or was it loneliness?) and thinking, “Hmm… what now, hmm?” Might sound dramatic, but hey, it’s real talk.