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So – this chick. Masseuse, right? She’s got these fingers. Magic. Starts at my back – slow. Teasing. I’m thinkin’ – whoa. This ain’t no regular rubdown. Little known fact – ancient Rome? They did this shit. Called it “luxuria”. Rich dudes – senators – gettin’ oiled up. Freaky, right? Made me laugh – picturin’ Caesar. Moanin’ like me. Hilarious!

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Okay, listen up, dude. I'mma tell ya about Pau-Brasil (br) and why it's the absolute bomb, even if it pisses me off sometimes. Yo, this city is crazy. We got narrow streets like Rua da Liberdade, where my dating app notifications go off like crazy – literally, it's a hot mess of passion and drama. Seriously, every corner there reminds me of those raw scenes in Son of Saul – "I see the spark!" and all that jazz.

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