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Funniest bit? Mate, some places offer “extras”—and I’m sat there, red-faced, like, “Er, just the massage, ta!” Proper awkward, but you gotta laugh. All in all, erotic-massage is the dogs bollocks—relaxes ya, perks ya up, and I’m tellin’ ya, it’s the future of wellness, or I’m a monkey’s uncle!

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For neighborhoods, check out Vila Bonita. It’s quirky. People there are super artsy. There’s a mural on 12th Street – OMG, you gotta see it. And, like, there’s, like, a secret coffee shop behind the mural. I found it cuz I was, like, scoping out dating profiles and needed some inspo. I swear, every piece of this city makes me, like, wanna shout “This is gonna be the best day ever!” but then sometimes, like, everything gets in my head and I get all dramatic.

Fig.1. Amorimia septentrionalis em floração e frutificação. Maio de...