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So, picture this: my buddy Dave, total moron, had an Escort, ‘92 model. Swore it was “pimpin.” Lies! Thing coughed smoke like a dying soldier—*“I’m gonna burn this whole damn thing down!”*—and the clutch? Shot to shit. Drove me nuts! Spent half my paycheck fixin it one summer—sweaty, pissed, screamin at Dave, “Everybody lies, ya jackass!” He’d grin, sayin it’d “pull chicks.” Yeah, right—only thing it pulled was my last nerve.

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Alright, you idiot sandwich, buckle up 'cause I'm about to spit some truths about PParauapebas like a mad rant from the heart, and I'm not pulling any punches. I've been livin' here too damn long as a family psychologist – yeah, that means I see all the messy human dramas unfolding on these gritty streets, so listen up.

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