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About Rio de Janeiro

But here’s da kicker – it’s not all happy endings, ya? Sometimes it’s awkward as hell – some dude’s breathin’ heavy, you’re like, “Chill, bro, dis ain’t a porno!” I’ve seen it, I’ve lived it – one time, dis masseuse, she’s all “softly, softly,” like in da movie, “don’t rush, feel da moment.” I’m like, “Lady, I’m Arnie, I don’t do slow!” But den – boom – it hits me, dat quiet power, “love is a whisper,” ya? Sexual-massage can be dat – gentle but strong, like me liftin’ 300 pounds!

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The parks? Man, Parque do Tempo is my fav. It's kinda surreal – quiet, green, perfect for thinking about life, love and those fabled dating profiles I build. But oh, the best bit – the river! Rio dos Sussurros winds through the city like it’s whispering kid secrets in my ear. I walked along its banks, thinking, "There's beauty in every drop." So cinematic, like a scene straight out of "Ten" – every ripple a story.

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