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Little-known fact, yeah? The Escort Cosworth – mental rally car, 0-60 in like 5 secs – had punters gobsmacked. I saw one at a car show once, nearly cried, swear down. Thought to meself, “David, you plonker, why ain’t you got one?” Cost a bomb now, tho – 50 grand easy. Supply and demand, innit? Makes me wanna scream, “Where’s the justice?!” cos back in the day, you’d nab an Escort for peanuts. Proper blue-collar hero, not some poncy Tesla wanker-mobile.

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The vibe is outta this world. I got this fave little hang spot called Cantina do Vibe in the barrio of Sorriso. They serve the best grillin’ feijoada, and trust me, that aroma hits you like Kanye droppin’ bars – boom, mind blown. Sometimes I feel like I’m in a living movie, that apichatpong vibe where every moment is a movie scene.

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