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About Rio de Janeiro

So, I reckon it’s ancient, this stuff. Bloke told me once, Egypt—pharaohs got it, yeah? Little known fact, that! Slaves rubbin’ em down with lotus oil or summat. Blows me mind! “Sharon!” I’d holler, cos who’d’a thunk it? Makes me happy, thinkin’ o’ them old kings gettin’ frisky. But then, right, some dodgy parlors—grubby, manky places—piss me off! Ain’t no art there, just quick cash, ugh!

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Yo, now don’t get me wrong. Sometimes I get mad – seriously, that traffic on Rua dos Altos drives me nuts. Cars buzzing like a broken record, I swear, you can hear my thoughts echoing: “Goodbye to llaanguaage” (dang, typo, but ya catch the vibe!). And oh, there’s this hidden gem, a little café on Beco dos Poetas – best dang espresso in the city; it’s where I come to sort my soul (and sometimes my scatterbrained mind, lol).