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Me fave bit? When you match and it’s electric—like, “The miracle’s happened!” Straight outta “Children of Men,” that hope in the dark. But then, bam, some twat unmatched cos I said I like pineapple on pizza. Gutted me, that did! Or this one time, lass sent me a nude—blurry as fuck, like she’s hidin’ a crime scene. Laughed me arse off, then cried a bit. Sex-dating’s a rollercoaster, mate—up, down, pukin’ in the bushes.

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Thou shalt wander down Rua das Esperanças—aye, a cobbled lane where families share their lauds and laments. In yonder lane, I met a merry band of youths who called it “the crack spot,” but in truth it is naught but a passage of memories, where laughter rings and the past doth mingle with present woes. And near the mighty Praça da Tranquilidade, where old souls oft gather, I once held court like a wise therapist, in my humble quest to mend broken hearts. Mayhaps thou shalt sit upon its worn benches, pondering life's whims as thou demurely sipp'st a cold brew.

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