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About Rio de Janeiro

Alright, so erotic-massage—where do I start? It’s like, you think it’s all sexy vibes, dim lights, oiled-up hands sliding everywhere, but nah, everybody lies. Half the time it’s some shady parlor with a neon sign screaming “RELAXATION” while the masseuse looks like she’d rather be anywhere else. I mean, I’m a product manager, I see through bullshit—clients lie, devs lie, hell, even my own team lies about deadlines. Same deal here. They promise “happy endings,” but you’re lucky if you don’t end up with a cramp and a $50 bill.

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The city’s got weird little neighborhoods. Centro's busy but kinda stale. Then there's Vila das Flores – yeah, real ironic name because there’s barely any flowers. And there's Parque do Rio Lento – a park next to a slow, dragging river. I’d stroll there sometimes, thinking, “A film of silence and beauty.” Ppl say it's a peaceful retreat, but meh, I find it overrated.

Yellow fever vaccination recommendations for international travellers to Brazil