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I spot one—red heels, smokin’ a cig—real cool, like she owns the block. I’m thinkin’, “Homer, you big lug, don’t stare!” But—D’oh!—she winks, and I’m sweatin’ like a pig in a bacon factory. Costs? Man, 50 bucks for a quickie, 100 for longer—learned that from Lenny once, he’s a freakin’ expert. Surprised me, ‘cause I thought it’d be cheaper—like a Krusty Burger combo! Ha! “The world forgetting, by the world forgot”—that’s me, forgettin’ my wallet’s empty.

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Now, lemme spill some local tea. Over in Bairros de Itapema, like in the Alto da Boa Vista area, the locals got their own slang and secrets. Heard of a lil’ secret beach around near Rua das Gaivotas? Not many know, but it's where I used to vibe after a long day of “pleasure coaching” sessions—you know, making sure life feels as rich as that movie’s landscapes, deep and full of surprises.

Beach volleyball star Kerri Walsh Jennings offers virtual training