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Worst bit? Catfishers, fuckin’ hell! Bloke pretended he’s a model—shows up, bald, beer gut! “You disgustin’ pig!” I roared. “I’m gonna carve ya like a swine!” Little story—mate of mine matched a “lass” once. Turns out, it’s his cousin! Nearly shat himself laughin’, grim as fuck! Sex-dating’s dark humor, eh?

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Then there’s the Rio da Esperança. It flows right past the old mill, Leve Joaninha, where every brick's a memory of better days. Hell, it’s inspirational, kinda makes ya wanna drop everything to scribble a poem – “every moment’s a fresh beginning”. And lemme tell ya, even my code gets poetic sometimes, in the midst of lonely debugging nights.

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