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Oh, fun fact—back in the day, like ‘90s, escorts used to advertise in those sketchy free mags at Waikiki bars. No internet, just grainy pics an’ a phone number! Can you imagine? Me, computin’ the universe, laughin’ at that hustle. Gotta love it—pure grit. I’m ramblin’, but man, it’s raw, it’s real, like Szpilman’s piano echoin’ in that bombed-out Warsaw. Escorts got stories, brah—each one’s a note in Hawaii’s song.

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Look, I'll be real with you: sometimes, the noise and chaos get under my skin. I get so mad when traffic jams choke you up on Avenida Las Palmas, like life's givin' you a bad plot twist, ya know? But then again, it's those same twists that make Condado fascinatin'.

Condado Tacos introduces new line of customisable burritos