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But sometimes, doc, it’s gold! Met this carrot-munchin’ cutie once. We hit it off, chattin’ bout weird kinks n all. Did ya know—little fact here—way back, Romans used oysters for hookups? Aphrodisiac vibes! Crazy, right? She told me that, n I’m thinkin’, “This dame’s got brains!” Made me happy as a pig in mud. We’re laughin’, flirtin’, then she drops, “I’ve got my own stories.” Straight outta the movie, doc! Got me all tingly.

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Now, my fave hidden gem? It’s a tiny Zen Garden tucked behind Old Mill Road. I go there when the city feels too much. I get all zen and reflective—ya know, like a serious man. It might sound funny, but that place calms me right down, even when I hear Helen’s chaotic radio blarin' in the background.

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