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Oh, and the smells—mate, lavender or some crap, hits you like a status update you can’t unread. Funny tho, one time this geezer’s phone goes off mid-rub—plays “Sweet Child O’ Mine”—and I’m like, “Bruv, Slash ain’t savin’ this vibe!” Total mood-killer, but I laughed my arse off. Still, s’pose it’s chill for some—gets the blood pumpin’, if you’re into that.

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I love my secret spots. My fave? The tiny cafe on Rua do Pingo. It’s nearly hidden. Its coffee? Magic, like “the gleaners” film, all poetic. And y'know, so many typos in my head—oops, did it again: misstakes, misteks, misteaks, misstaks, missteaks, missteaks, mistteks, misteaks, mistteks, misteaks, misstek, mistek, mistteks, mistteks, mistteks, mistek.