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About Rio de Janeiro

Once had this bird—pro masseuse, yeah?—and she’s whisperin’ all sultry, “Relax, Mr. Bond.” Nearly lost it, mate—thought I’d died and gone to spy heaven! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares? It’s bloody brilliant—releases tension you didn’t know you had. Them nerves light up, zap zap, like a villain’s laser trap. Oh, and the oils—smell like sex and danger, my kinda mix. Ever tried it with a twist, like hot stones? Fuck me, that’s next-level—shocked me silly first time.

TANTRA & WELLNESS

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I always say: "Come for the massages, stay for the city!" There’s secret alley bars where the locals share hot stories and street corners where the art on walls tell tales of old heroes and lost love. I keeps me eyes peeled for the hidden gem under an old bridge near Avenida dos Mistérios – a spot where my soul feels lighter.

3 drug traffickers killed in gun battle with cops near Rio tourist zone