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About Rio de Janeiro

So, I tried it once, swear to God, at this shady joint downtown. Guy’s hands were like freakin’ magic, slidin’ all over, and I’m like, “D’oh! Why’d I wait so long?” Little known fact—ancient Greeks did this crap, called it “anatripsis” or some fancy word. Bet they were all oiled up, wrestlin’ naked, then bam—sexual-massage time! Made me happy as a pig in mud, but I got pissed too—why ain’t this on TV more? Screw reality shows, gimme oily hands!

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Now, lemme drop some wisdom like House would: every swipe, every "it's not you, it's me" is a reminder – nothing's ever simple. I’ve grown irate watching false profiles parade as truth. I code, I complain, I live in this beautiful mess. And yeah, sometimes I laugh, sometimes I swear, sometimes I just wanna shout “Everybody lies!” at the top of my lungs.