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So, I tried it once—D’oh!—total mess! Lady’s like, “Relax, Homer,” but I’m all tense, thinkin’ bout Marge catchin’ me. Felt like a freakin’ donut gettin’ glazed, ya know? Slippery as hell—oil everywhere! Little fact: they use weird stuff like almond oil, not even donut grease! Surprised me, man, thought it’d be all fake and porny, but nah, it’s legit chill. Got me happy—muscles all loose, like after a good nap. But then—D’oh!—she hits a knot, hurts like hell! “That’s a bingo!” I yell, straight outta Inglourious Basterds. She’s confused, I’m laughin’—classic me.

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Golden Shower (give) · Full Body Sensual Massage · Prostate Massage · Kissing if good chemistry · Intimate massage · 69 Position · Classic Sex · Girlfriend Experience.

I can’t help but dish out my sexologist insights (yeah, I’m that snarky expert on love and lust). The intense glances of couples strolling by the Avenida Brasil, all flirty and secret-like, remind me of scenes from "The Headless Woman" where every gesture hides a mystery. Trust me, if you wander near the old Circuito Cultural on Rua dos Girassóis, you'll feel like you’re in a living, breathing art installation—sensual, raw, and sometimes borderline ridiculous.

At necropsy, severe brain congestion of a vampire bat ill from...