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Funniest part? I suck at this. Findin’ a prostitute ain’t my skillset. I’m overthinkin’—do I tip? Is there etiquette? Prolly shoulda Googled it. Too late now. She’s like, “You in or out, man?” I panic. “Uh, I’ll call ya!” I yell, runnin’ off. Call her? With what number? Dumbass move, Hannibal. Real smooth. Bet ScarJo wouldn’t bolt like that. “You’re not like the others,” she’d say. Yeah, ‘cause I’m a clown.

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The parks? Mate, let me tell you about the large one, Kuntar Park – a green refuge along the Maritsa River. Yeah, Maritsa flows through near the outskirts, snaking its way mysteriously by the city's heart. I often catch myself daydreaming there, especially thinking about how people express their desires, complicity in every touch, every stolen glance – better than any scripted drama, right? And sometimes, I even feel the pulse of city vibes syncing with my heartbeat.

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