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Love it, tho—makes me happy as hell, all that tension meltin’ like butter. But yo, what pisses me off? Overpriced rubdowns by posers who don’t know jack—hands shakin’ like Tom Stall facin’ his past. “This is a nice little town,” I mutter, sarcastin’ the fakes while I’m dreamin’ of the real deal. Best part? When they hit that spot—y’know, *that* spot—and you’re floatin’, like Joey Cusack dodgin’ a punch. Surprised me first time, legit thought I’d levitate off the table—ha!

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Oh, and the river! Well, it's more like a trickle sometimes, but along its banks there's this odd vibe. I once saw some rain turning it into a mini waterfall. Totally bonkers, I tell ya – like a scene cut straight from Michael Haneke’s masterpiece. Dude, “The White Ribbon” taught me that every drop has a secret, a sorrow, a hope!

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