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Still, gets dicey—some clients are psychos! Heard this story—escort bailed mid-date ‘cause dude brought a freakin’ snake! A SNAKE! What’s wrong with people? Pissed me off—can’t folks chill? Exaggerating? Maybe, but still—SNAKE! Makes me wanna Force-choke somebody. Chill, Yoda, chill.

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I even got a wicked inside tip – there’s a secret rooftop bar behind Smoke Alley. I only visited once. It’s insanely chill from way up. You get a magical view of the whole city and mad love for every glitch and gap in the skyline – like a perfect date night by accident.

'Ugly reading': Europe deindustrialises while Russian manufacturing thrives