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About Bruges

Ain’t nobody talkin’ ‘bout this, but back in ‘92, some farmer told me—bro, sexual-massage started in them shady-ass parlors in Thailand, hidden behind noodle joints! True story, motherfucker! Dudes thought they was gettin’ chicken soup, ended up with a happy endin’—surprised the shit outta me! I’m sittin’ there, tractor hummin’, laughin’ my ass off thinkin’ ‘bout it. You ever tried it? Hands all up in places—fuck, it’s intense! Makes me wanna yell, “Motherfucker, keep goin’!” like I’m cheerin’ a damn rodeo.

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Sometimes, I get so mad ‘cause not enough peeps know how rad Kruibeke really is, ya know? Like, whaaat? It’s full of quirky cafés, chill rooftops, and tiny art spots. My favorite hideout? A teeny, artsy nook near the old mill on Verrestraat – super hidden, so only locals vibe there. I always think, "Girl, you ARE the city!" and repeat, "it’s bad b*tch o’clock!" until I feel like I'm in a flick.

Miss Belgium badly hurt in serious traffic accident